Staff retreat is finally over yesterday. Anyway, it's quite good on a whole, since we pulled it off. I expect it to be a gloomy event without much excitement, guess I'm wrong. It's ended up with RONO being the fastest finishing house!!

Well, obviously, there's room for improvement, there always is. However, I really think yesterday we really did a good job. First time I felt like an OGL rather than in the planning committee.

On another note, I'm concerned about another team. Not the council family of cause, but just a 4 member team. To the 3 of you guys, let me tell you what I've learnt about ownership.

Ownership to a project is much more than commitment. It's the attitude behind the quality of the project. Commitment gets the job done, ownership gets the job well done. We got a great project, and of cause, I believe we got a great working attitude. Yet, at the closing period to this project, I felt the ownership being drained from another team member, or rather, the team leader.

Do you know how bad a member would feel if they think that the ownership from a team leader is not there? It would feel like there's a failure in the system of doing a project. If there's ownership from the team leader, the project would move definitely. However, when there's no ownership, the project would be just a borderline and average thing. Nothing more, nothing less, lifeless.

I felt this lack of ownership in you because I willingly gave up a job opportunity I had for weeks, which starts on the last day of the project, where all members are requested to be present. I gave up the job which would earn myself SGD1300 for a 12 days work, so that I could come back and do a closure to this project. I cut my working duration to only 4 days, just because I want to do a proper closure to this. What can I say? At least there's this ownership in me which i'm proud of, and a priority for what needs to come before the other.

Suddenly, I feel like that's what I have, the qualities you should have now, which you have not. If I should be called demanding, then so be it. It's the me which I'm proud to have. Demand makes things work and done, it pushes the economy of strongholds, and also placed pride and achievement right where they belong. Being demanding may not seem like a bad thing, but to me, I believe that demands need to be made when ownership is not present.

I feel bad for the following reasons, after saying so much. I feel bad that I still could not understand the heartbeat of my leader, since I should have, a long time ago. Understanding the heartbeat of a leader could push the project with quality, and that very heartbeat could be crucial in some projects, but not this one. I feel bad that I thought I had understood you, but in the end, what I've done is just the tip of the iceberg.

I also feel bad because I could not bring my point across to another. I failed as a team member when the team leader could not understand how a member feels, and with that I felt bad. Miscommunication and created impressions are often negative, that being said, I do not have a created impression of you just because of this incident, my impression of you as a leader is still good overall.

I also feel bad because I think that you are too insecure. Leaders stand by their judgement, and only corrects their judgement if other's are more justifiable than yourself's. I think my words and opinions influence your replies to be that of a "Charles Kingshaw". It's not the words a leader should say, nor the thoughts a leader should have. If my words are harsh and you can't take it, please tell me I'm rude, and make me change for the better. What you should not have done is to show your insecurities. You had my respect as a team leader, had. Sad to say, with your last reply, you've lost my respect as a team leader.

If you are reading this, know what I mean by this, sometimes emotions can't help when you go against someone with a different perspective. I do not disclose my private matters to those who I work with. I also have to lead, and maybe my way of leading is different from yours. What I can say is that your way of leading is not my way of following, and hence I'm sorry since I can't be the follower under your leading style.

So much for a Sunday. Tomorrow's OP, and I hope you'll do well, leader, I still have that much faith in you. Please, try your best not to prove me wrong.